“I am your Mother” Your words fell like sweet rain into the barren caverns of my motherless grief. “I am the One who gave you life; who sustains you. I am the One who feeds you, who comforts you, who nurtures you. I am the One who loves you and who has always loved you. I am your Mother.” Mother God? Help me. I do not know you this way. Mother. God. ------ Can a … [Read more...] about Mother God

I sat alone, thinking about you when I sensed you kneeling in front of me. My response was like Peter’s: “Lord, it is I who should...” but I saw the joy on your face. Jesus, you are divine, yet you call yourself my brother and kneel before me, a Joyful Servant. I want to receive this gift from you. Jesus, I want be like you. Teach me to kneel in joy with you before all … [Read more...] about Joyful Servant

You, God, are the vulnerable One. I am creature, child. Yet my heart is rock hard in places. While your heart— your heart is liquid love and longing. You hold nothing back. ------ How often I have longed to gather your children together, as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings but you would not. Matthew 23:37 From Heaven at my Door by Juanita Ryan … [Read more...] about Vulnerable One

You hold me gently, allowing me to be a child. Allowing me to not understand, to say “it is too hard for me.” Allowing me to say “I need you” all the time. You hold me securely, allowing me to be a child. Allowing me to love you— sweet innocence restored. Allowing me to feel myself tenderly loved by you. You hold me always, allowing me to be a child. Allowing me to be alive, … [Read more...] about You Hold Me

It is you I want Love I came from, Love that made me. Ah, to return to your heart’s vast ocean, where I lose myself, and find myself, and lose myself again. ------ As the deer pants for streams of water, so my soul pants for you, O God. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God. Psalm 42:1 From Heaven at my Door by Juanita Ryan … [Read more...] about It Is You I Want

Quivering I stared into the black abyss until I felt you nudge me to let go and slip over the edge. I found myself floating in that darkness held and filled with energy so sweet and strong it could only be you. Your voice came to me rich and playful, “Child, did you really think there could be anywhere that I am not?” ------ Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I … [Read more...] about You Were There

You swaddled me in white robed arms, rescued me from my dark terror. I carried pain, but you carried me away and up, up into the light, until I burst into a thousand splintered rays of joy. ------ I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you. Isaiah 46:4 From Heaven at my Door by Juanita Ryan … [Read more...] about You Carried Me

You came running up behind me and jumped up on my back, asking for a ride and laughing in my ear. Out of nowhere you ambushed me and left me suddenly smiling. My feet that had been dragging suddenly are dancing. This is no quiet, somber thoughtful joy. It is a foot-stomping knee-slapping raucous joy. I never dreamed that joy would catch up to me. You have given me a … [Read more...] about Surprise Party

Give me the grace to care without neglecting my needs, the humility to assist without rescuing, the kindness to be clear without being cold, the mercy to be angry without rejecting, the prudence to disclose without disrespecting my privacy, the humor to admit human failings without experiencing shame, the compassion to give freely, fully, without selfish ambition … [Read more...] about Give Me the Grace

You invite me to be your child. An overture I have often declined since the thought of childhood frightens me. But I am beginning to wonder if you are offering me an experience of childhood as it was meant to be. Maybe you are saying that with you I can enjoy unselfconscious wonder, because you will share in my delight. That, with you, I can be unabashedly dependent because … [Read more...] about Your Child?